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Monthly Archives: June 2012

BREAKING NEWS: I am very sad right now. Not only did I just ruin my soup by diluting it to its current taste of seven-day-old socks, but it is also no longer hot and my hands are freezing. WHY IS IT SO COLD? AUSTRALIA, THIS IS NOT MEANT TO HAPPEN. SURE, I LOVE WINTER BUT ONLY WHEN IT SNOWS AND THIS IS JUST RIDICULOUS WE LIVE ON THE COAST ISN’T THE SEA MEANT TO HAVE A MODERATING INFLUENCE? coldddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd. I SWEAR THE RIVER OUTSIDE IS FROZEN. IT BETTER BE SNOWING SOMEWHERE.

Anyway, moving on. While my driving leaves much to be desired, my parents seem to trust me enough to let me drive around their new cars. Which is why, this morning, I experienced the trippy role reversal of dropping my mum off to the station. That was interesting. I also forgot to indicate right outside the police station. I don’t think they noticed. Please don’t tell them.

As I may have very mildly implied (don’t worry if you missed it, I’m renowned for my subtlety) in my news flash above, IT’S BLOODY FREEZING. At this stage, having sat down to write this, it’s not just my toes that are about to snap off. Why is my back so cold? and my nose. and… is that… my breath fogging up? AT HOME? IN AUSTRALIA? Something is very very wrong.

So anyway, it’s cold. Don’t believe yahoo weather’s lies, it’s not 11 degrees. fahrenheit, maybe.

I’m pretty sure the street looks like this.

Finally, may I present to you the Confucianist stylings of my grandma. So last night, as has become a routine for the past few Saturdays (yeah, my Saturday nights get preeeetty rowdy), we went and had a nice dinner with my grandparents. So while she’s normally in some state of age-induced torpor, last night she was unexpectedly and delightfully lucid; so without any further ado, may I present to you choice quote #1 from my grandma:

“You have to join more parties. Then you will have the girls.”

Yes, I spent an hour last night discussing my love life with my grandma.
And she has a treasure trove of experience. Apparently, when she was at uni, boys would come and leave cakes for her and her friends at their dormitory door. It doesn’t get much more romantic than that. My grandma and her band of oriental seductresses had other plans though.
Their motto: Take the cake, break the heart.

But the keen advice doesn’t stop there!

“So, Hor-Hor, which university should I go to: Sydney or New South?”
“You go UNSW.”
“Oh. But actually, I liked Sydney more. The courses really suit me.”
“No, UNSW bigger. Have better girls. You go there.”

Choice quote #2:

“If she’s not pretty, I don’t talk to you.”

sounds legit.

Finally, the night deteriorated into rating my asian Facebook friends, which produced this pearler:

“Koreans are dumb. Like a dumb hobo.”

And when I showed her my pictures:

“This is a man.”

Oh Hor-Hor, you’re the best.

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It’s not hard to come up with words that rhyme. Especially when the internet provides with such helpful tools as this: http://wikirhymer.com/words/queen/end-rhymes.

But despite these beautiful suggestions, of which my favourites include antisubmarine, mangosteen, and newsmagazine, I still can’t come up with ANY LYRICS AT ALL. I’M SORRY GUYS, I’M BATTLING HARD HERE. I’M TRYING, HONESTLY I AM.

My sleep cycle also seems to be battling hard. Funny things start to happen once the clock ticks over past midnight and the witching hour begins… Last night I felt like I had an epiphany about doing all of the things, but I think somehow my motivation melts under sunlight, cause I’m feeling pretty lazy right about now.

ANYWAY. This post makes no sense, and I’m not even half-asleep. Or maybe I am. It’s kinda hard to tell.

Also, I found this hilarious last night, but now, who knows?

 

I need some sleep.

I have a lot of shoes. A lot of shoes. Far too many shoes for one guy to have.

But in spite of that, I got new shoes. I like them a lot.
In my defence, though, I was forced to – my old school shoes were falling apart (c’mon mum I don’t really mind wet feet) and so I got some sexy shoes in the mid-year sales woo.
Also I’ve just bought some new ugg boots. What is it with all my favourite shoes inconsiderately developing holes? my poor green chucks are starting to go too…

Ok to be honest, news just rhymes with shoes.

But that could be a thing to do – take a news article every so often, and comment on it. That’d be nice actually! Maybe the NY Times op-ed or something, once a fortnight or so. hmmm…

In other news, I have too much music. C’MON PHONE YOU CAN FIT IT ALL ON. pleaseeeeeee???
(that reminds me. My phone needs a name. I called my old ipod clementine, but it just didn’t seem to fit. Thoughts?)
Finally, the timing of gigs is so shit. First the xx arrive before I’m 18. THEN snakadaktal play in the middle of my trials. GODDAMN HSC.

blogging at 11 on a school night. HOH DAMN WATCH OUT.
what is this world coming to…

 


This video looks like fun. LOTS AND LOTS OF FUN. Gotta love that regispek.

So Hank Green just drove me to make my first substantial comment on a YouTube video. I’m not quite sure why that feels like such a big deal. It isn’t, really, but I suppose that while over the years my confidence in certain areas has skyrocketed, in others I still remain painfully shy. Even with the cloak of online anonymity, I always seem reticent when it comes to sharing my thoughts online.

AND WHAT DO YOU KNOW, THAT LEADS ME TO MY THIRD POINT.

So by “this”, I mean this blog. What am I hoping to achieve by doing this? I think I really need to get this clear, so I can perhaps write more frequently, or find some sort of greater motivation to post.

-It’s a good thing, I reckon, to just be able to thought dump on a (virtual) page using words. I guess I am pretty much turning this into a diary, which is alright, but I would like some sort of greater purpose or focus.

(side note: IT’S BLOODY FREEZING. but I just said to myself that I would try and waste less, so I can’t turn on the heating. And I just can’t be bothered to get up and grab a jumper. Damn.)

-Also, this is a completely new thing for me. And it’s nice, to feel like I’m throwing caution to the wind by, in some small way, challenging myself to write. And so i guess I’m just doing this right now ’cause it’s something new.

-Finally, I suck at telling stories. Particularly interesting stories. with jokes! and humour! and laughs! Also I’ve now discovered that I’m equally as bad at writing them. SO. I reckon my biggest goal here is to get better at writing. Also at being funny. But that’s a long way off.

I think this is getting too serious.

Have a dancing bear.

WHICH REMINDS ME.

Snakadaktal. Dance Bear. Hectic track. Look it up.

WARNING: This post borders on crazy emotional rant-domness. Read at your own risk. (also, it’s quite boring).

I just rewatched Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (thanks, Form I English, for that impulse to italicize).
I think it may now be my favourite film.
I am filled WITH SO MANY FEELS RIGHT NOW.

One of the greatest things about it, which I suspect I may not paid great attention to upon first viewing, is the soundtrack. I’m not even really sure why. It’s probably no different in purpose, effectiveness, whatever, from any other soundtrack. Definitely I remember True Grit and The Social Network (also probs at the top of my fave films) having fantastic soundtracks that managed to perfectly evoke certain moods. In True Grit, that sequence near the end where Rooster’s carrying Mattie back to civilisation, and medical attention and that, and that beautiful kinda inspirational frontier music is playing, and it’s full of promise and hope yet tangible idk reality or something, like it evokes some sort of deep bitterness or something. WHY ARE THESE WORDS SO WRONG. oh well, that was my shot at being clever about something arty and “cultured” hahaha.
But also in The Social Network, it’s so cool at the beginning where he’s running across the Harvard campus and there’s this weird sort of underlying tension and movement promised by the music, and it’s kinda discordant or atonal or something. Yeah. That was cool too

ANYWAY.

Back to the original point. Eternal Sunshine is incredible. I love it so much. I love Michel Gondry so much.
And it’s amazing what a soundtrack adds emotionally to everything that happens. Like when there’s a memory montage of like halcyon dates (particularly the parade, near the end of the film) and the kinda happy inspirational instrumental music is incredible.

Life should have a soundtrack.

I wish I knew enough music to try to compose a soundtrack to even one day.
(actually, that’s a pretty good goal hmmm…)

(ps MY GOD. TRYING TO USE BIG WORDS AND SOUNDING LIKE A PRETENTIOUS DICK.
that’s me wooooooo. I deeply apologize.)

“i’m still alive, i swear.”

glad that’s out of the way.

So today, I’ve got a treat for you.
Without further ado, I present my number one “productive procrastination”: http://www.knoword.org/
Not to brag or anything… but I got 2000 ON HARD. YEAH BUDDYYYYY. WHAT AN ACHIEVEMENT. I guess that’s what happens when you keep on skipping words and then getting the same words cycled back to you over and over and over again until you don’t even bother to read the definition.

Another brilliant feature of the lovely internet that recently made its way into my life: spotify

Yep this swedish brilliance has finally made its way down under, and is a very handy addition to the PLETHORA of distractions that plague my beleaguered attention span. But anyway. Give it a go. It’s pretty mad.

Finally, post-assessment sloth is nothing new. BUT THE ASSESSMENTS NEVER END.

THEY NEVER END.